Purely Social Smoking

I'm officially an occasional social smoker. Since 22 Dec 2008, I haven't smoked regularly. I had a cigarette last night and probably another cigarette since that time.

In the absence of pregnancy, nicotine replacement therapy is a great help. I don't think the gum really did much use to me but I LOVE the lozenges. They have a different texture, they make your mouth really uncomfortable - but they also provide you with the nicotine buzz you need. I don't even take the lozenges now because they give that funny buzz to your mouth.

How do I feel around smokers? I don't really care if people smoke, but I think it looks bad when women smoke. I think smoking at bus-stops, whilst walking, standing around is absolutely ugly - and I was one of those people. I hate the smell of cigarettes now too. Vincent still smokes. He finds it too hard to quit. If he quits, we'll save $400 per month... I wonder if he realizes that..

Nearly 1 week smoke-free!!!!

Ok, I won't say I did it like an angel. I had a puff off Vincent's cigarette yesterday. It was Dunhill's from my grandma and it tasted like shit.

The rest of the time, I just go without cigarettes. I am still using nicotine lozenges, but have now reduced my dosage to only a couple of times a day. I still need one in the morning because that habitual morning smoke is what kills me.

I'm still coughing up gunk, especially in the morning. These days, I spit out yellow to brownish mucus. I think some of it is tar. The more disgusting my spit is, the happier I am.

I finally got my pole today too!!! It's really tiring trying out the moves on the pole.. I've forgotten a lot of beginner's pole, so I think I'm going back to do that again. I'll probably do that in February, after my beginners pilates class. My exercise schedule is so crazy I can't even keep up with it myself...

Not that I'm getting any fitter though. There's virtually nothing I can do to make my tummy firm again. I eat too much, I drink too much.. and I simply do not have enough stamina to keep working on the pole over and over again.

I've gotta try harder tomorrow.

Quitting Cigarettes

Smoking History
Started: November 1994

First Quit Attempt: 1 January 2007
Reason: Pregnancy
End of Smoke-Free Period: July 2008

Second Quit Attempt: 22 December 2008
Reason: Disgusting habit, need to save money

Yesterday was the 1st day I went through an entire day without cigarettes. I had the help of nicotine gum and lozenges. Even though it has only been 6 months of continuous smoking, I could feel the effects of nicotine withdrawal. I woke up craving a cigarette, but didn't have any in the house - and Vincent didn't leave me any (I told him not to).

I went to work and announced to everyone that I quit cigarettes. I wanted to make sure that everyone would be watching me so that I don't fall back into temptation.

The worst times are mornings, just after waking and nights, just before bed. Mid morning, I was dizzy.. but kept drinking lots of cold water. I love my cough. I'm coughing up gunk. Not as much as I would like to.. perhaps I don't really have that much gunk after 6 mths of smoking, but it's satisfying to know that cilia is repairing itself in my respiratory tract and I am coughing up the toxins and tar that has caused my smoker's cough.

My gunk tastes of tobacco. It is disgusting but true. I was able to smell cigarettes on smokers who have just had cigarettes before entering the elevator. I'm making progress.

Right now, I feel like another cigarette. I feel a little light-headed but I'm sucking on a nicotine lozenge. I'm trying to cough up more gunk. This should keep me going for another day.